DAY 1/40

Today, i start my journey deep within myself and in him to finding out my purpose.

first thing i read: It's not about you.



try to remind yourself each day that your purpose in life is far greater than YOU. sounds ironic to think that YOUR purpose has nothing to do with what YOU want, YOUR ambitions, YOUR career, or YOUR relationships. finding true self is about self-sacrifice and giving up those thoughts to really focus on GOD's plan. Reminding myself that even before i had these thoughts, even before i had my family, friends, or career, or was even born! - a purpose was already predetermined for me. So none of those 'little' things should matter in determining what i should DO with my life - as long as it is fulfilling the plan that GOD has already made for me.
I guess when it is put this way, things don't look so complex/cluttered. Its really just the simple bare truths that can help us make the hardest decisions in our lives...doing LESS in life- by focusing on what matters most.

so step one to know ur purpose: Ask God. Build a Relationship. Read his Wisdom.
"Everything got started in him and finds its purpose in Him." Colossians 1:16b


I wonder where i will be in a year from now...but whereever it is i hope that beyond the outside variables (work, family, boyfriend?, friends, health, dance, etc), I find confidence in who i am & have purpose in what i am doing. I know that i can achieve that because im at sucha lowly place right now - i havent felt this lost, confused, and insecure about myself in a long time. Its almost like UCI just masked it with such ecstacy and joy that i didn't ever feel that kinda pain as i do now...and the time is ticking for us....i guess instead of asking what do i want, it's what have you planned for me lord?